KV-2, the derp to rule them all.
I wrote this to bring you something amusing and to improve my writing. It is still somewhat informative but bear in mind that this was not my main goal. If you are looking for gameplay advice this is not the right post
A few weeks ago I got the KV-2. And I like it. But why do I like it? Personally I can't stand heavy tanks. They are slow and sluggish, and I am used to light and medium tanks.
The KV-2 is no exception to other heavy tanks. In fact, it might be one of the most sluggish tanks out there. It is equipped with a 560bhp diesel engine. Now, 560 horses is a decent amount, but this brute simply weighs too much. As a result, the KV-2's top speed is as exciting as bingo night at an old peoples home. Try to climb a hill and the KV-2 gets slower than me on a sunday morning. I read somewhere that a few steam powered KV-2 tanks were made. Oh dear, I pity the souls who had to operate those.
Next thing is the KV-2's traverse 'speed'. One would swear the KV-2 has the exact same traverse speed as mother earth: Making a 360 takes exactly 24 hours. You have the same turret traverse speed as the earth as well. Which is interesting because the earth does not have a turret.
The KV-2 also has poor visibility. I imagine your commander must feel as if he is sitting in a mailbox. Mailboxes don't have good visibility.
So how are the gun characteristics? Well, poor. The reload time is so bad that you can make yourself a cup of tea while the gun gets prepared to fire once more. The aim time is two eternities and when your crew is finally done aiming the accuracy is still so poor it is in fact possible to accidently shoot yourself.
You must be thinking that this tank is very terrible. I have liked a few tanks that are very terrible. Tanks I wanted to forgive. The T-28 russian medium tier 4 was horrible. But it looked nice and cute and it was fast. I wanted to love it because I thought it did not have many friends.
But then you click the left mousebutton. And then you remember that KV-2 is not one of those tanks you just want to forgive. The KV-2 reminds you that it is capable of sending small atomic bombs to those pitiful dinky toys that dare enter its killzone.
On the eighth day God created the KV-2. And he saw it was right.
[link] [99 comments]